• Home
  • About
  • Connect
  • Press/Media

The Pinke Post

  • Life in North Dakota
  • Recipes
  • Small Town Living
  • Women In Ag

Posted By Katie On December 27, 2015 1 Comment

The gift of presence (not presents)

Filed Under: Family Values Tagged With: family, family fun, holidays 1 Comment

When my mother-in-law and I were headed to my son’s first basketball game in Ellendale, N.D., we struck up a conversation about Christmas celebrations gone by. Both her dad and mom’s families came to the U.S. on boats from German Russian roots. The first-generation Americans settled near Kulm and Wishek, N.D. With limited resources and numerous children and grandchildren, not everyone received a pretty package for Christmas—but that was OK because the holiday wasn’t about presents. It wasn’t about elaborate decorations or menus, either.Christmas_Carol

My sister-in-law, Lori, mother-in-law, Carol and husband Nathan on Christmas together.

At the heart of my mother-in-law’s most cherished Christmas celebrations are the people—siblings, parents, grandparents, cousins, aunt, uncles, neighbors and friends. Sitting down and eating a traditional Christmas Day German Russian feast with loved ones was a gift. Sharing a box of apples, a winter delicacy on the snowy North Dakota prairie, with other children tops her list of Christmas memories.

To keep some of the German Russian recipes alive, I have been baking with my mother-in-law. The tradition has little to do with the food but everything to do with our family and spending time together to honor our ancestors.

When I encounter people this time of year, I can’t help but wonder what Christmas is like for them. I went to the grocery store to stock up on butter, white and brown sugar, cream and flour for baking and saw several elderly people with their groceries in tow heading to the local transit service bus. I was saddened to think they might spend Christmas alone.

At the basketball game, I saw a friend who lost her dad this year. Another friend who lost both of his sons this summer in a terrible car accident came to watch Hunter and sat with us. Their tables and traditions will be different this year at Christmas. Amidst the joy of the season, there will be a void because people are gone.

Thankfully, when the heart of the celebration is different, memories are a gift that can bring a smile to our faces.

Strip away the commercialization of Christmas and scale back on the presents and give the gift of time this year to those you love, those who are mourning and even those who are difficult to love. Who’s hurting in your life? Who is lonely this Christmas season? Do you have a relationship to mend? I can think of people I need to love more and not let slip through the cracks of the “busyness” of the season.

Words aren’t always necessary to show you care. Share a cup of Christmas tea with a neighbor, enjoy a box of fresh fruit with the kids at your church or crank up the Christmas carols and sing along with your family. My favorite Christmas memory is when my grandpa or dad read the book of Luke in the Bible on Christmas Eve.Christmas_Grandparentswkids

Our three kids spent Christmas with all sets of their living grandparents and great-grandparents including my parents, Nathan’s parents and my grandparents. I appreciate the scheduling and cooperation this takes. Our kids share many memories with all grandparents several times a year.

If you can’t celebrate Christmas with people you love, remember they’re only a phone call or handwritten note away. While nothing beats being together, don’t miss an opportunity to express your love and appreciation. Christmas is a twelve day celebration and ends on my birthday, January 6. You still have time to share your presence.

There’s nothing wrong with buying and giving gifts at Christmas, adorning your house with twinkling lights or preparing a feast. I love gift-giving and hosting Christmas feasts at our home. Remember, though, Christmas is about people—whether that’s celebrating with 1 person or 50, under the same roof or via the phone.

Gifts lose their appeal in a matter of days. Eventually, Christmas lights are taken down and put back in storage. Even if you gorge yourself on a Christmas buffet, you’ll be hungry again. People and memories are etched in our minds forever.  

(This was originally published as my weekly column in Agweek.)

Share this:

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Pinterest
  • LinkedIn
  • Email
  • Print
Previous Post: « Find a local music concert for Christmas
Next Post: How will you spend your time in 2016? »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Ruth Smaaladen says

    December 27, 2015 at 7:32 pm

    Enjoyed! What are the German dishes you made for Christmas. I’m not familiar with them.

    Reply

Leave a Reply Cancel reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Primary Sidebar

Welcome to the Prairie…

I am a mom of three kids and a wife to Nathan. Together we live on the North Dakota prairie, 97 miles from a Starbuck's. I share about family, food, farming and the prairie that I love. I used to commute 98 miles one-way to work but it required too much coffee. So now I am home, consulting, speaking, writing and primarily, juggling family life.
See more of our life on the prairie... Facebook | Instagram | Pinterest | Twitter

Stay in Touch…

Get the news from the prairie delivered directly to your inbox when it's hot off the press!

from my kitchen. . .

Citrus Spice Grilled Chicken

Pie

Cheeseburger Fries Hotdish

farm life

Favorite Farm Girls

  • Beyer Beware
  • GOODEness Gracious
  • The Wife of a Dairyman
  • Fresh from the Farm

Griggs Dakota

Visit our 5th generation family farm...

Latest Recipes

How To Make Snowman Sundaes

Real Farmwives & Friends: My Favorite Christmas Entertaining Recipes

Rhubarb Sauce Recipe

More Posts from this Category

Life on the Prairie…

More Posts from this Category

Women in Agriculture

Ladies Night on a North Dakota farm

Sarah Nasello’s Party on the Prairie Giveaway

Debbie Lyons-Blythe of Kids, Cows and Grass & The Need For Organ Donors

More Posts from this Category

Footer

Archives

Categories

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries RSS
  • Comments RSS
  • WordPress.org

Copyright © 2023 ·Captivating Theme ·Custom Designed by Design Chicky· Log in

loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.